Bitchslap The Monkey
A helper monkey turns on a 2-year old. Reporters are given a cornucopia of hilarious quotes with which to craft an article.
(Please note that it took no fewer than three people to write this story. I can only speculate that while the others were doubled over laughing, one managed to get some notes down.)

"i'll bitch-slap you and your monkey" - HA!
monkey boy 03 Aug 2004