How to Spin a GOP Sex Scandal?
Call the perp a Democrat...
See how they handled it on the Factor!
The Associated Press joined in too.
I swear to Yahweh, I wish this type of crap never happened in politics. Wouldn't it be cool if our reps could spend their time doing something positive for the country, rather than cover their ass (or in the case of Hastert, add to their ass). But when things like this come along, it proves the Dems are just patsies. Networks like Fox KNOW they can pull this bogus "error" bs and get away with it.
Stupid Sneaky Brilliant Punks.
John Mark Karr Superstar
OK, so it's not like this isn't getting enough press already . . . but come on!
This dude couldn't overpower a little girl if his life depended on it. About the only thing he seems guilty of is wearing too much eyeliner and maybe wearing white pumps after Labor Day.
While we're on the subject of the media and finding various "at-large" killers . . . Osama Bin Laden, anyone?
Bush Scapegoat Hamdan Released - No Major Media Outlet Covers the Story.
After 4 years in prison, bogus terrorist suspect Salim Hamdan has been released. A judge had told the racist, activist and opportunist Bush adminstration they don't have a legal leg to stand on. Hamdan was let go today, and after a tearful reunion with his family, was more gracious than anyone deserved.
Apparently it's not patriotic for the media or Bush to admit massive mistakes, whether intentional or clueless.
Watch for a full page ad later this week:
"Unpopular and incompetent administration seeks political scapegoat. Must be non-Caucasian and beyond the interest or defense of the American media. No background in this country preferred. We'll make one up for you..."
...And Where's Osama?
CNN Freudian Slip?
Is CNN trying to tell us something? (News Alert)
[thanks, Jim!]
WBEZ to Eliminate All Music Programming
WBEZ general manager Torey Malatia has announced plans to eliminate all music programming on the station in favor of a new all talk news and cultural programming format. This means the elimination of Piano Jazz with Marian McPartland, Encanto Latina, Comin' Home, Afropop, Jazz with Dick Buckley, Blues before sunrise, and evening jazz programming. As a dedicated listener and member of WBEZ, I'm greatly saddened by this news. Earlier plans to have a sister station devoted to music programming have been scrapped. WBEZ offers a great and intelligent variety of music that is not represented anywhere else on the dial and reflects Chicago's cultural heritage. Anyone who has listened to Dick Buckley's programming over the last 30 years will recognize that he is a Chicago treasure. If you, like me, are disturbed by the news, you can sign a petition to urge a change in plans, or you can make your opinion known on the WBEZ forum, or better still, attend the upcoming public meeting at Columbia College this Thursday from 6:00-7:30 and voice your opinion.
The unexamined life...
Okay, stop what ya doin', 'cuz I'm about to ruin... your productivity. Here's two fun quizzes to help you learn more about yourself:
Which New York Times Op-Ed Columnist Are You?
or, for those who gots dey edumacation on da STREET:
What Kind of Thug Are You?
How is it possible for me to be both Bob Herbert and Chris Rock at the same time? Hmm...
Via Erica and her sis.
An open letter to Scott McClellan
Dear Mr. McClellan,
I am writing you in regard to the now-vacant position of White House press corps plant.
It is my understanding that your previous press corps plant, James D. Guckert - to whom you issued White House press credentials under the name Jeff Gannon - is no longer with the administration.
I realize, of course, that because of the flap over the administration's policy of having conservative columnists on the payroll, it may not be politically feasible to fill Mr. Guckert's position right away. However, when you do begin hiring again, I hope you will consider me.
If my name seems at all familiar, it is probably because I have written to you in the past hoping to secure a contract writing pro-administration columns. As a point of reference, I am the one who offered to push your agenda at the rate of $500 per column, or three for $1,399, which I still believe represents an excellent value in today's marketplace.
In regard to the position of press-corps plant, I do not pretend to have the strong conservative affiliation that Mr. Guckert enjoyed with TalonNews.com. Although my newspaper has editorially endorsed President Bush for re-election, it is otherwise a mainstream media operation, and not linked to the Texas Republican Party.
Despite this obvious hole in my resume, I still believe I would be an excellent replacement for Mr. Guckert, who I feel is one of the great press corps plants of all time. Certainly the question he asked at President Bush's press conference about the president's pledge to reach out to Democrats - "How are you going to work with people who seem to have divorced themselves from reality?" - was nothing short of brilliant.
To give you an idea of my own abilities, I have put together a few sample press conference questions for your consideration:
Mr. President, at this point in your tenure you have not made a single wrong decision. Do you find it difficult to work with this kind of incredible record, or is perfection something you get used to over time?
Mr. President, now that Iraq has held free elections, your policy has been proven to be correct and democracy is on the march in the Middle East, how do you respond to those who are calling you the greatest American since FDR?
Mr. President, Social Security is in such a serious crisis that if your plan to change it is not adopted immediately, senior citizens are going to be dropping like flies by next winter. Is this why you deplore the scare tactics being used by those who oppose your plan?
Finally, Mr. McClellan, because I know you don't like your press-corps plants to go by their real names, I have been working on coming up with a suitable alias, and have decided on the following - Kent Clark. What do you think?
Again, thank you for your time, sir, and I will be waiting to hear from you.
P.S. The three columns for $1,399 offer is still good while supplies last.
(mad props 2 the author of this: Jim Shea - www.courant.com
scott b. pointed it out - made my day with this one)
By March, TiVo viewers will see "billboards," or small logos, popping up over TV commercials as they fast-forward through them, offering contest entries, giveaways or links to other ads. If a viewer "opts in" to the ad, their contact information will be downloaded to that advertiser — exclusively and by permission only — so even more direct marketing can take place.
Jon Stewart Bitchslaps CNN's 'Crossfire' Show
That's right, Jon Stewart will probably never be invited back on CNN, or possibly any other cable news network show ever again.
On today's episode Jon Stewart tells it like it really is
Order your own copy of it on DVD here. Make sure you specify the show name "Crossfire" and the show topic "Jon Stewart's America".
Andrew also pointed me to the BitTorrent here
While you're waiting for it to download, read the full transcripts here
Best. Headline. Ever.
Rudi Pecker assumes position in top slot in Asia.
After 14 years inside Misys in Europe, Rudi Pecker has been elevated to the financial technology company's Singapore office, to become head of Asia Pacific sales. In this role, Pecker will head all Misys' strategic and commercial activities in the region, aiming to grow the business and enter into long term relationships. Pecker's breadth of experience, with over 20 years in the financial services industry, will enable him to rise to the challenges of growing the business in Asia, a region fertile for expansion.
My fave is actually last on the list as a "Word To Watch":
Aramaic (The Passion of The Christ): Now beginning to be translated as ‘bling-bling’.
I'll offer practical usage: "Check out that sweet Lexus, it's Aramaic!"
But I would also suggest it could be used as a general superlative: "Aw, hells, that oral sex was Aramaic!"
Winnie asks the darndest things...
That's House 8's very own Winster (pink scarf, for those of you unfortunate enough to NOT know Winnie...) grilling Heathcliff Huxtable at Martha Stewart's trial in NYC. Photo from Savemartha.com. Here's another of Winnie giving Bill her best "I'm the cutest damned reporter EVER" look.
Canada's favorite son and leader of the Evaporators, Nardwuar, interviews various rock legends wearing stupid clothes and using an annoying voice. He asks the questions that nobody else dares, "Vanilla Ice, with the album To The Extreme, did you coin the phrase 'Extreme?' Like, are you responsible for 'Extreme Sports' there, Vanilla Ice?"
Tons and tons of juicy stuff. Doot do do doot do...
TV's Tipping Point: Why The Digital Revolution Is Only Just Beginning
Ashley Highfield's speech on opening up the Beeb's archives, and on "The Way Things Ought To Be" in general. Good read.
via boing boing, naturally.
Smashing.
via boing boing
I am so glad I got transferred!
This is what I have come to in my job as a hard news television journalist...covering the push to make Aug. 13th National Underwear Day. Freshpair.com feels that for the amount of money people in the US spend annually on underwear (over $12 billion) it should get more respect and recognition. Thus, they are sponsoring National Underwear Day, when everyone can showcase a small part of their underwear for a day. They have a petition available and today I followed 20 models around New York City, surveys in hand to help influence people to electronically sign their petition so that they can get the day enacted nationally.
(what missle launcher?? we're talkin' undies!)
The Federal Communications Commission is scheduled to vote this week to lift a ban on companies or individuals owning both a newspaper and a television or radio station in the same city. Led by its three Republican members, including Chairman Michael Powell (son of Secretary of State Colin), the commission will also most likely raise the television station ownership cap. That would allow media firms to own outlets that in total can reach 45 percent of the national audience, up from 35 percent now.
Keanu shares the wealth with the production people who made the movie so cool.
This on top of the Harley motorcycles he bought for the stunt people, not to mention the money he's given to leukemia research on his sister's behalf.
Rock on, Keanu. It's nice to see someone value the people who help them be great.
When Elizabeth Smart went missing in Utah, the National Enquirer published details of alleged salacious sexual antics involving her family, based on help from two local reporters, who split a $20,000 fee for the info.
On Sunday the reporters' paper, the Salt Lake City Tribune published a letter from the Editor which the Enquirer found libelous and now threatens a lawsuit over.
The reporters, whose resignations were rejected, have now been fired.
Anyone wonder why the media in this country is despised by so many?
CNN comes clean. Not pretty.
An interesting collection of war photos...
via Neal
Warning: This ain't your mamma's CNN.com.
via boing boing
Read the war in real-time.
via boing boing
"Nobody was even talking about it," Garippa said. "There was a rumor that Eminem died, that was the big thing today. We found out it wasn't true."
Here's my favorite bit: the need to "qualify" Eminem.
Eminem is the edgy rap artist popular among young people.
Thanks, New Jersey dot com!
via obscure store
In today's Trib, economist Joel Naroff, president of Naroff Economic Advisors, expounds on the current recession: "Growth is up, growth is down, the economy's growth is all over town."
He later suggested that Cindy-Lou Who might be out of a job at the Whoville Truffula Refinery by the end of the quarter.
Further Proof That TV is Tearing Some Families Apart. Literally.
via Drudgereport - I know, I know
The "Coolest Seats in Town" contest by Birmingham-based BRMB, which required participants to sit on blocks of dry ice at -78C, left some with permanent scarring.
Oh, what a feeling
Okay, so I'm watching MSNBC, and they cut to commercials - but before they do, they show the Toyota "Image of the Day".
Well, it's a picture of a US soldier looking down the scope of his rifle, with the words "Get the feeling" following it on the fadeout.
I'm hooked, let's shoot 'em up! Who edits this sh*t?
Cinemorgue: The ultimate spoiler site...
An open letter to Time/AOL
Dear Time.com
I am writing because I just finished reading one of the articles that I linked to from The netscape start page that is the default page when I open my browser. The article in question was, "Ready To Move In: U.S. forces could be primed to start fighting Iraq again in short order" By MARK THOMPSON/WASHINGTON.
This is perhaps one of the most irresponsible and inflamatory articles that I have recently had the opportunity to read. The article, while mentioning nothing of the fact that Iraq has so far complied with inspections (although unwillingly), or the report submitted by Iraq detailing their programs, it gleefully extols the virtues of how our military advances could provide us with a new war just in time for Christmas. While this may be true, it clearly belies that fact that mass marketing journalism and Time in particular has no taste for thoughtful reporting, but tends strongly towards sensationalist tabloid journalism and irresponsible pro-war propaganda. Although Time magazine presents itself as a legitimate source of news, this is clearly not so.
While attempting to read another of your articles to see if in fact, your publication does give fair voice to both sides of the issues, I was confronted not with an article, but a synopsis of an article and a prompt to subscribe for a fee to read the full story. I feel compelled to let you know that the model of paying for news content on the internet is an idea whose time has not come, and will, with any luck, signal the demise of your publication and its sister in mediocrity, AOL.
I will be changing my default browser page from your partner, Netscape, to a more reputable news source, and will be letting them know why.
Thank you,
John Fuller
Ewwwww...
As Ella uncovers more and more of what has gone on at Quentins, she begins to question the wisdom of capturing it all in a documentary. Are there some stories that are too sacred to be told, some secrets that must be kept? By getting to know the people that pass through the doors of Quentins, Ella has finally gotten to know herself.
You may have watched the news, or read the papers, now Sky News would like to give you the chance to share your own personal memories of the major breaking news stories of the past year with a wider audience. These will form a special online archive called SkyWitness.
Whatever your story, Sky News would like to hear from you. The best eyewitness accounts will be published on a dedicated website in a personal end of year review. The person with the most compelling story will win a pocket digital video camera and be offered a tour of the Sky News Centre (over in Great Britain).
Q says, "In the old days they just hired reporters"
*sniff sniff* Ah'm so proud ah could jus' burst...
House 8's very own Karen K. gets her...er...words in the paper. Go check out 60 Seconds with Karen Keenan over yonder at ePrairie dot com.
No one demonstrates an effortless command over the term "spiffy" like K-Luv...
I came across this article on unhappy fans recutting their favorite movies, to meet their own expectations, when the director wimps out.
Case in point: Speilberg's version of AI vs. Kubrick's, and Lucas' version of The Phantom Menace
No, I'm not making light of anyone abusing and killing animals for fun and profit. And the idea of weapons of this nature in these fuckers' hands is scary as hell.
But if we could all step back from this for just a second and think about how Onion-esque these headlines are...
Interesting links to video of the news of 911 as it happened. Get horrified all over again.
The case of the Friendswood dentist accused of murdering her husband by repeatedly running over him has taken more twists as tales of spying and allegations about the "other woman" emerged from court papers and an episode of Sally Jessy Raphael.
The Chronicle has learned that in April 2001, the mistress, Gail Bridges, and friend Julie Knight appeared in disguise and with their voices altered on a segment titled, My Husband Spies on Me!
--------
It's an update on this story, and a nice companion piece to this one from Johnny JPEG. Texas Trash! Woo Hoo!
Bill Cosby disapproves of "The Osbournes." Don't worry, Bill. with our attention spans these days, I doubt Ozzy will outlast Dr. Heathcliff Huxtible.
Am I the only one that loves them BOTH?
Sure, watch the amusing Flash animation. More importantly, send a letter to your representatives (house | senate) to let them know what a piece of shit CBDTPA is.
via Lots of places
Disney (the greedy all consuming behemoth that indoctrinates the nations children in stereotypes) is being audited!
he heh he...
Where's Michael Eisner trumpeting the "special magic" of an IRS audit.
In response to a question on why personal video recorders (PVR's) were bad for the industry, Kellner responded: "Because of the ad skips.... It's theft. Your contract with the network when you get the show is you're going to watch the spots. Otherwise you couldn't get the show on an ad-supported basis. Any time you skip a commercial or watch the button you're actually stealing the programming."
"You! Yes! You, the fat guy in Tulsa! No more bathroom breaks or we're pulling the plug!"
Initially, I was just going to let this one slide, but as I finished the article and clicked Back (in Internet Explorer), I got this.
I quote: Mozilla also lets you turn off all Web-based pop-up ads, for all eternity, with a single click. Beyond bliss.
You mean, like that one, AOL Time Warner? Loser of 54 Beeeellliiion dollars? Why would Time magazine even bother printing such a pointless, shameless plug-piece like this? Why not just shove Mozilla straight down the optical nerve of the 32 bagilzillion eyeballs* they claim to have in those FUCKING ANNOYING AOL disks (like the one I threw away today) and be done with it?
* Seriously, that number changes faster than McDonald's serves hamburgers.
via Evhead
One senior Fox executive said Cafasso was so convincing and seemed to have such respected patrons at the Pentagon, that there was no reason to question him. ̉He was so confident,Ó the executive said. ̉The sheer brazenness of it is just remarkable.Ó
Hmmm....
I remember one day when Mary-Kate was doing a really important scene when she's feeling really overwhelmed, and she's crying and drinking a beer in the shower because she's so stressed out. There's no dialog. It was so powerful. I cried. I just wanted to get in the shower with her and hug her, like we do at home sometimes."
Yowza!
via CriticalMAS
Sian Thurkettle, 25, who first saw the film at the cinema in 1982, has also collected more than 80 E.T. figures and 300 items carrying the extra-terrestrial's image, the Sun newspaper reported on Tuesday.
According to a spokeswoman for Sony Music Entertainment, it is clearly stated on the front of the booklet and on the back of the jewel box that the CD "will not play on a PC or a Mac" in the language of the country in which it is sold.
That's a friggin' bargain in my book, now what can you do about Michael Bolton?
It's a bird. It's a plane. No, it's Polyp Man, and he's no superhero. I wonder what asshole thought this up...
In the simplest of all terms, there is no 72-DD Kandy Kane, no Pretty Kitty club, and no boob-suffocated Daniel Greene. We checked other news sources, and nothing in this tale of freakish demise stood up to scrutiny. As fake as it is, we still love this article, if only for its "Who could have known that when he was waving his hands around, he was signaling for help?" Such mental images were meant to live forever.
Whoa. Didn't see that one coming!
Claiming that the "America Strikes Back ¨" slogan belongs to them, No Apologies! Press (NA!P) formally filed a trademark infringement suit today against the National Broadcasting Company (NBC), Cable News Network (CNN) and Fox Entertainment Group.
We wanted to give our audience the best war slogan, period. One that would shake our loyal readers, just like 'Rock You Like a Hurricane' totally caught The Scorpion's fan base off-guard, even though they already knew The Scorpions rocked."
