Just put him anywhere

Our dim ↓ president

As featured on CNN's lead story "Bushes pushes Guest Worker Program." Apparently he pushed the program into the shadow of yesterday's eclipse.

The Saga of Bloodninja

Twisted and hilarious Internet chat logs.

Continue reading "The Saga of Bloodninja" »

Make your own Jebus toast

Want to make some quick cash on ebay? Just brew up some jesus toast with these easy to follow directions.

We are idiots!

This is too funny not to share.

Fun at the expense of nutbag Christians

The Virgin Megastore Conquest

Our goal was to take over a bank of 35 listening stations on eastern wall of the Virgin Megastore on 14th Street.  After taking control we would carry out a 2-phase mission of 1) standing robotically staring out and 2) performing a choreographed dance. 

< snip >

The security and staff of the Megastore continued to huddle together and discuss the situation.  Eventually the police arrived.  Friends of IE Agents overheard the following exchange:

Megastore guy:  They were all just standing there.
Cop:  What were they doing?
Megastore guy:  Just standing, and then they all danced. 
Cop:  Did they say anything?
Megastore guy:  No.

Pause

Cop:  Why are we here?
 
Newer Conquests

Friends foil Olympia man's home

"Chris Kirk laughs while walking through the front room of his apartment, which his friend, Luke Trerice, decked in aluminum foil. Kirk had gone out of town and let Trerice use the apartment, giving Trerice the opportunity for the practical joke."

Nikeground

Hah hah!

This happened at my alma mater, University of Rochester, only for real. A large multinational corporation came in and re-named the common eating/hanging out/procrastinating area (known informally as "The Pit") to "PepsiCo Plaza." Put up a sign and everything!

"Hey man, catch ya at PepsiCo Plaza later! We'll get a slice!"

via one.point.zero

Google "I'm Feeling Lucky" search: "French Military Victories"

What was that about "soft targets?"

via Q

DeMoulin Bros Catalog

Back in the good ol' days, a three-wheeled rollicking mustang goat only cost $53. And for an exta 10 bucks you could get a camel body!

Why does this seem like a really twisted cousin of J. Peterman? (And if you're doing any holiday shopping, I'll take 3 of these, please and thank you.)

via coudal

Commuter Does an Indiana Jones

Yeee-haaa!

Scary CEO Masks

Look no further for the perfect Halloween costume.

via Andrew

Dear Saddam, How Can I Help?

Hacking Saddam's mailbox?

Chicago Rejection Hotline

Memorize this number and you'll never have to make one up again (esp. handy for hotties). Call it -- it's semi-funny!

312-458-9650


via Liz

Q's busy, so I'll do it.

Dead deer dumped on campus

via Obscure Store

Gummi Bears Defeat Fingerprint Sensors

Flushed with his success, he took latent fingerprints from a glass, which he enhanced with a cyanoacrylate adhesive (super-glue fumes) and photographed with a digital camera. Using PhotoShop, he improved the contrast of the image and printed the fingerprint onto a transparency sheet.

Between this and the Celine Dion encryption bypass, I hardly feel safe anywhere.

Have a good trip, Johnny

Say hi to all them Yalies for us...

"For God, for Country, and for Yale."

via Obscure Store

No More AOL CDs

AT NOMOREAOLCDS.COM, Jim McKenna and John Lieberman are asking people to send in the promotional discs. When theyÕve collected a million of them Ñ assuming they collect a million of them Ñ they intend to conduct a giant publicity stunt and truck them from Berkeley, Calif., to AOL-Time Warner headquarters in Virginia, in an attempt to convince the giant corporation to halt (or at least curtail) the practice of blanketing what seems like the entire free world with them.

via msnbc

Arnold has a little computer problem.

Here's what happened when Arnold called the Gateway help desk.

via Hari

The Finger

However, our pal Joe did come away from the signing with a real treasure. "I'm sorry, this was the only book I could afford!" he blurted out as he handed the "Starkist Tuna for Today Cookbook" over to Mr. Nimoy to sign. "Could you please write, 'I love tuna'?" he asked innocently. Nimoy raised a Vulcan eyebrow. "Does that mean something?" he asked, slyly. Was the logical Mr. Spock afraid we would trap him into admitting he liked pussy? Of course.

It's like wherever I go, the nose follows me!

Enjoy ten or fifteen seconds of fun at Dubya's expense.

Arnold Schwarzenegger prank calls!

Otherwise known as a geek, a sampler and a telephone. There are also a couple prank calls by Al Pacino, Norman Bates and Joe Pecsi.

via Garbage Truck 4000