What We Need: A Global War On Bathtubs
We're gonna fight 'em in the showroom, so we don't have to fight 'em in the bathroom.
"A False Sense of Insecurity?", a must-read paper on assessing the risk of terrorism.
...in almost all years, the total number of people worldwide who die at the hands of international terrorists anywhere in the world is not much more than the number who drown in bathtubs in the United States.
As soon as we're done with bathtubs, it's on to lightning, and Q's favorite conspiracy target, DEER.
Freedom of Speech
Iraqis are marching in support of Hezbollah chanting all the typical favorites, Death to Israel...Death to America.
"Saddam and Bush, Two Faces of One Coin" was scrawled on Bush's effigy.
That's a loose translation. I believe another interpretation is "We will be greeted as liberators."
Fiasco
Two excerpts from Thomas Ricks' Fiasco: The American Military Adventure in Iraq, published in the Washington Post.
1) In Iraq, Military Forgot the Lessons of Vietnam
On May 16, 2003, L. Paul Bremer III, the chief of the Coalition Provisional Authority, the U.S.-run occupation agency, had issued his first order, "De-Baathification of Iraq Society." The CIA station chief in Baghdad had argued vehemently against the radical move, contending that, "By nightfall, you'll have driven 30,000 to 50,000 Baathists underground. And in six months, you'll really regret this."
He was proved correct, as Bremer's order, along with a second that dissolved the Iraqi military and national police, created a new class of disenfranchised, threatened leaders.
2) It Looked Weird and Felt Wrong
Lt. Col. David Poirier, who commanded a military police battalion attached to the 4th Infantry Division and was based in Tikrit from June 2003 to March 2004, said the division's approach was indiscriminate. "With the brigade and battalion commanders, it became a philosophy: 'Round up all the military-age males, because we don't know who's good or bad.' " Col. Alan King, a civil affairs officer working at the Coalition Provisional Authority, had a similar impression of the 4th Infantry's approach. "Every male from 16 to 60" that the 4th Infantry could catch was detained, he said. "And when they got out, they were supporters of the insurgency."
[via dack]
I feel safer already
A Homeland Security report exposes some rather skewed "potential target" data, and the great state of Indiana is at the top of the list of potential terrorist targets by state.
The National Asset Database, as it is known, is so flawed, the inspector general found, that as of January, Indiana, with 8,591 potential terrorist targets, had 50 percent more listed sites than New York (5,687) and more than twice as many as California (3,212), ranking the state the most target-rich place in the nation.
Now, Graf and I have always joked that we'd love it if "they just got rid of Indiana" during the drive from Chicago to Cleveland, but I never realized there was government funding studying the potential... Maybe it's all those fireworks stores? Casinos? KKK members? All those damned Amish?
Some other high-level targets inlcude:
- A petting zoo in Woodville, Ala.
- Mule Day Parade in Columbia, Tenn.
- “Nix’s Check Cashing”
(Ed. That's where MCA does all his "phony-paper-passin'")
- etc.
Morrissey the Terrorist
Morrissey (Yes, that Morrissey) was picked up by the FBI and questioned because he called President Bush a "terrorist."
I feel safer now knowing our people have their eye on him, don't you?
Your Tax Dollars At Work
As expected, more photos from Abu Ghraib (or, as Dubya prefers, "Aboo Gareff") are all over the Internets. They are burly.
Guardian Unlimited
uruknet.info
When Chimps Attack II
Fred Durst shows you his 'O' face (WARNING: Spyware-laden link. Proceed at your own risk. Thanks, Nora).
WARNING: NSFW. Actually, not safe for anyone with the gift of sight.
More
everywhere
else.
andrew
to:
celebrity,
censorship,
clowns,
crime,
disasters,
disturbing,
don't view at work,
douchebag,
dumb people,
entertainment,
fraud,
gross,
hack,
internet,
kittens,
monkeys,
schadenfreude,
sex, drugs, rock & roll,
terrorism
Comments (1)
Torture Schmorture
New horrors have been disclosed but noone is covering it. The usual games "C.Y.A." and "plausible deniability" are playing out in the White House over recent U.S. torture. The morally superior GOP is having a hard time defining when tactics become torture, they should just define it via our soldiers. When does brutally coaxing info out of an American GI become torture?
- Choking a prisoner till he thinks he's going to die?
- Kicking them until they pass out?
- M.P.'s forcing you on the ground to jump on your back and legs?
- Severe skin burns that require three months' hospitalization and skin grafts?
- Beat ing someone with a chair until the chair breaks.
- Using a police stick to sodomize detainees®.
- Inserting a banana into a detainees anus.
- Covering detainees in feces, with their hands encased in sandbags.
- Forcing a Muslim to eat pork. Forcing liquor down his throat and telling him to thank Jesus that he's alive? (What a swell introduction to American Christianity)
- Maybe it's when 5 people you question don't live through your interrogation.
It's all grey to me. Than God I'm on the "virtuous" side.
Oh yeah, the asshole who approved this is going to be our D.A.
Response to the election
A 25-year-old veteran from Georgia distraught over President Bush's re-election shot and killed himself at ground zero. Andrew Veal's body was found Saturday morning inside the off-limits site, a shotgun was found nearby.
Veal's mother said her son was upset about the result of the presidential election and had driven to New York. Friends said Veal worked in a computer lab at the University of Georgia. "I'm absolutely sure it's a protest," said Veal's supervisor.
9/11-American Air Flight 77 hit the Pentigon... or did it?
This is a pretty compelling video about American Fight 77. Simply stated... if it was a plane hit the building, where's the wreckage?
This film makes a good case that there was some kind of cover up. You decide...
http://www.freedomunderground.org/memoryhole/pentagon.php#Preloader
or
http://www.nixtro.com/pentagon121.swf
The Warren Report Redux
The 9-11 commission are selling the limp, no-account conclusions of their report all over the airwaves today. It illustrates the country's unwavering faith in institutions teeming with ineffective white men who look grave while spouting drivel and take/assign no responsibility.
To help calibrate your moral guage:
- Tenuous suggestions that Saddam might have a bomb are absolutley conclusive enough to pre-emptively invade a country, and kill 8000 people.
- Ten or twelve major blown opportunities to prevent 9-11 are no one's fault.
Don't you hate when you spend $40 billion on intelligence and you only get thirty buck worth of groupthink? With drones like these who needs enemies?
All the intelligence community should give their salaries back for the last five years to help repay for the damage they "weren't responsible for."
Troubling...
Did anyone else hear the statement that the Madrid bombings occurred 911 days after 9-11?
In an update to this, looks like Mike Hawash is in deep shit.
Anyone register www.stringmikehawashupbyhisshortandcurlies.com yet?
His friends still think he's innocent, though. And, according to KATU in Portland, are poking "wholes" in the FBI case.
via Qtip
Unfortunately, I don't think this is an April Fool's joke.
via boing boing
Try to absorb as much of the radiation as possible with your groin region. After 5 minutes and 12 seconds, however, you may become sterile
Bad Hair Day
Islamic fundamentalists believe that anyone who is martyred while killing infidels goes to paradise, where 72 virgins are promised to them if they shaved recently. It is suspected that Shaikh Mohammed gave himself up this weekend when he realized he'd never get his hands on enough razors for the job.
Khalid Shaikh Mohammed, the alleged Sept. 11 mastermind, is seen shortly after his capture.
Bin Ladens escaped via elaborate "phone switcheroo"
Today's American "intelligence" idiocy bombshell:
With U.S. forces closing in on him during the battle of Tora Bora in late 2001, one of bin Ladens longtime bodyguards took possession of the al Qaeda leaders satellite phone on the assumption that U.S. intelligence agencies were monitoring it to get a fix on their position.
The bodyguard moved away from bin Laden and his entourage as they fled; he continued to use the phone in an effort to divert the Americans and allow bin Laden to escape. He was captured at Tora Bora in possession of the phone, officials said.
When did we learn this? How long was this revelation delayed to minimize damaging Bush's ratings?
How many billions of our tax dollars go into military and bureaucratic intelligence? And we're defeated by a ruse this ridiculous? Can I retroactively bill the government twenty billion dollars for being able to caution against a dodge this idiotic? What level of counter-intelligence is too low to concern ourselves with? Hey intelligence community! Keep your eyes peeled! Next time he might change into his pirate disguise.
I can't believe this isn't a scandal at least as big as some of the previous boondoggles.
I'm picturing bin Laden laughing, saying: "Wow I can't believe that worked."
What a fucking joke.
Read about Bimbo Barbie, then take the poll and decide which Barbies are real.
Uh, do I have a 6 year old girl in the house, or what?
Regarding Iraq's acceptance of immediate and unconditional demands that weapons inspectors be allowed back into Iraq:
The White House was skeptical of the offer, warning that Baghdad was trying to evade strong UN action. Washington's skepticism is hardly surprising, not only because of Saddam's long history of cat-and-mouse defiance of the UN on disarmament issues, but also because the Bush Administration's ultimate objective is not to bring Saddam into compliance with Security Council resolutions, but to win international consent for a military campaign to oust his regime. If his offer to cooperate is perceived as genuine, Saddam undermines the case for war.
What a wet blanket! How dare he undermine our case for bombing them! I swear, if he ruins this season's war...
Three uncooperative Mslim suspects are being detained right now in Florida after being overheard in a Diner saying "They think they were sad on 9/11, wait until 9/13."
A witness heard the men talking about Miami and they indicated they were running about five hours behind.
She said she heard one of the men ask: "Do you think we have enough to bring it down?"
No, I'm not making light of anyone abusing and killing animals for fun and profit. And the idea of weapons of this nature in these fuckers' hands is scary as hell.
But if we could all step back from this for just a second and think about how Onion-esque these headlines are...
Forget nuclear dirty-bombs. Apparently we have to worry about socially retarded, roach-breeding Japanese psychos with an inability to find a girlfriend as well.
via one.point.zero
MILLIONS of people have watched this woman die. Yet none saw her face.
Officials Worried Shuttle Could Be Target
U.S. intelligence sources tell ABCNEWS that NASA officials are increasingly worried that the July 19 launch of the Space Shuttle, which will be carrying an Israeli astronaut for the first time, could be a prime target for terrorists. Giving weight to the concern is the fact that suspicious activity has been observed around the launch complex that could have been surveillance, the sources said.
The fear is that the launch could be vulnerable to a suicide attack by a small, low-flying plane, the sources said.
Having an Israeli astronaut on an American rocket could make the launch a target too attractive for some desperate terrorist groups to resist, the intelligence sources said.
Concerns about the space shuttle launch come amid heightened fears about the possibility of weapons of mass destruction being smuggled into the United States on cargo ships.
(lyrics and art by the one and only pazen. Sing along!)
1,2,3,4,5, Geo. Bush wants me dead or alive...
I like criminals, murderers, terrorists & cheaters,
and as I continue, you know it gets sweeter...
A little bit of Syria, in my life
A little bit of Jordan, by my side
A little bit of Yemen, is what I see
A little bit of Kuwait, all I need
A little bit of anthrax, in the sun
A little scud missile, all night long
so come on Junior, here I am
ain't scared of you, cuz I'm the man
Have no doubt people. I am at war. I didn't want it, but these mice have invaded my homeland. I sleep here, and I eat here, and I someday hope to entertain girls here. The mice have to go, dead or alive.
So there is no confusion, this is a war. There will be casualties. Emotion plays no role in this. I know the enemy, and it is mouse.
via consumptive.org
In a controversial interrogation tactic that one prominent human-rights organization says "borders on torture," CIA operatives in Afghanistan have been showing Al Qaeda prisoners the Mariah Carey film "Glitter."
'Nuff said.
via have browser, will travel
this was pretty interesting...bin laden really looks like shit now. i guess all the hiding in caves will do that for you. i still won't be satisfied until only his beard is left.
via cnn
